It’s called “Mini Moo’s.” I believe this to be a grammatical error and that it’s probably meant to be plural, meaning that the name should be “Mini Moos.” But what if it’s accurate, and the apostrophe is meant to act as a possessive? What is this brand of coffee creamer meant to possess exactly--the ability to suck?
The primary brand of Mini Moo’s is “Land o’ Lakes,” which features the image of a pretty Native American woman. To me, this is mixing metaphors. What am I supposed to think of, a small cow or a hot girl? Is the creamer suggesting that the woman is actually a cow? This is not very nice.
The fact that there’s a Native American woman anywhere near the damn thing. What, we commit genocide against their people and in return they get to festoon our dairy products? “Thanks for that blanket covered in smallpox. In return, here, have some lightly salted butter.” The parent brand of Land o’ Lakes is a company called “Real"--I can only presume that stands for Real Sensitive.
It says “Not necessary to refrigerate.” This scares me.
It says “Shake Well before Using.” That, in combination with the lack of necessary refrigeration, really scares me.
I use this stuff five days out of the week.
Let this blog serve as my living will: I am prepared to donate my skeleton to science so nerds in coats can assess the after effects.
Posted by Greg at 08:04 AM on 02/16/09
Link to This