If you ever need to recognize the sheer gulf of separation between Man and Woman, simply understand that there’s a pop culture artifact called “The Vagina Monologues.” People don’t even think twice about this, because they intuitively understand that a vagina could actually recite a monologue.  But can you ever think of the word “monologue” alongside the word “penis”?  Penises can’t even give you directions to the interstate, much less yak for several minutes.  Women are always saying “Why don’t you talk more about your feelings?” and Men reply “That’s easy for you to say. You’ve got twice the equipment for that.”

Penises don’t understand language.  The only way they relate to the world is in terms of traffic lights.  The penis understands “Stop” and “Go"--and it also registers “Time to slow down,” but usually takes that as an invitation to speed up and get on through before the signal actually changes to red.