Cashier: You’re using your debit card? Fine. And may I please see some I.D.?
Me: ......huh?
Cashier: I need to see some I.D., please.
Me: Oh. Right. How silly of me to forget. And God Bless you.
Annoying Bozo in Line Next to Me: Aww, whatever, she’s just trying to rack up the compliments and gratitude in advance of 2004, aren’t you, hahahahahahaha.
Cashier: Listen, honey, I don’t care what you call it. This ain’t the time of year I need to get socked with a $1,000 fine.
Me: Yeah, lay off her. The nice, smart lady is just doing her job as she runs the best cash register in the entire city.
I wonder what time of year would be good to get socked with a $1,000 fine?
Once again, Ismat cuts right to the heart of the matter....when WOULD be a good time?
If you’re able to call down heavenly blessings on the cashier, this sounds like a good opportunity to invoke Satan’s wrath on Mr. Jerkwad. “Good point sir, and while we’re at it, may the scanner misread all your purchases and may your bankcard be consumed in the fiery sea when you swipe it.” Serves him right for trying to outwit you.
Let me guess, was he buying a case of Hamm’s with a 3rd party check?
wow i should take you along to work with me
AND i bet she didn’t try to steal your candy bar, either…
Greg...I’m officially swarming you. If you want to tell alcohol stories, you should at least link to your oldest, bestest alkie buddie...Me. Happy New Year to you and all of your friends. You can take the guy out of Ukiah, but…
you’re the cutest commenter ever
Well, this is one of my New Year’s resolutions: trying to keep track of your blog.
And this is a fine start.
You know, even though I do enjoy the occasional tipple, come New Year’s I tend to go for the Martinelli’s Sparkling Apple Cider, probably because I’m a huge wimp, plus on New Year’s Eve 2001 I was at this party in Jamaica Plain with a lot of lesbians and a few guys, and I was drinking vodka martinis one after the other when I had this sudden realization that I could have just had a small ball peen hammer and hit myself repeatedly in the forehead for more or less the exact same effect, and all the while my running gag that evening was, “I sure am looking forward to the HAL 9000 that’s supposed to come out later this year, I hear it does everything!” and pretty much all the women there were all like, “Oh, ha ha,” and then walking away, while the guys were like, “Is that from Apple? I hadn’t heard about that one.”
ANYhoo, so yeah, Martinelli’s. I found this 99 cent store out in southern California, while I was out there for New Year’s, and they were selling the big bottles for, well, 99 cents. Which made me feel that this whole time I’ve been thinking that $1.99 was a bargain price, well, now . . .
What exactly again was my main point?