Ever notice how when you first invite someone over, you clean your place from top to bottom until the space shuttle can see your things gleam from way up in the atmosphere, and the next time the person comes over you clean everything yet again, but gradually you become more comfortable with the person and you think “Well, maybe I’ll just scrub the bathroom a little,” and the next time you just throw your dirty socks into a pile in the corner, and eventually the person comes over and says “Whoa. There’s a rotting cow corpse in the middle of your living room” and you say “Yeah, weird huh? It just wandered in off the street and died right there on the carpet. I’ve been meaning to get rid of it but man, it’s been a busy month. So, hey, you want a beer?”
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No, I DON’T ever notice that.
I always keep my house clean when I have friends over… but maybe that just means I keep my emotions heavily guarded and I’m a brooding psychopath.
I’m a bit obsessive about cleaning if people are coming over. Which makes it awkwrad when friends drop by unannounced:
“Uh, Dani, it’s been ten minutes. Are you going to open the door?"|
“Sure, nearly done! Just let me scrub the kitchen sink clean wih a toothbrush!”
I actually made my ex-mother-in-law visit with the kids in the yard the other day when she dropped by unannounced. Outsiders did not need to witness the mess 3 boys and a basement renovation can do to a home.
Yeah, I have noticed that. I’ve also noticed that I do the same thing with the real ME. Clean it up, act real pretty, until I feel safe enough to let it all hang out. Although, as I’ve gotten older, I’ve noticed a tendancy to drop the act, both with the house and with myself. What you see is what you get. If you don’t like it - there’s the door! (one of the advantages of age!)
My version of cleaning before people come over is to tell them “oh by the way, the place is a sty, but I moved the catbox out of the guest room for you”.
In fairness, this is mostly the cow’s fault.
Is it a problem having the buzzards in the living room?
Have you been peeking in my windows? ‘cause I’m wondering about the “rotting cow corpse” comment… I only stress about the fact that my house isn’t clean when I’m encountered by drop-ins; there’s so much more to do than make sure the house is straightened 100% of the time! I do try to pick up the big chunks when invited company comes, however.
you could just tell them you’re doing a ”Rob Roy” theme with your decor. Then slice them shoulder-to-sternum with a broadswoard. Then beer.
I love guests. Preferably stewed.
Thanks for the beer. And, really, the cow was no big deal. It made me feel more comfortable with putting my feet up on your furniture and making myself at home. Though I didn’t buy your story of how the cow ended up there. I mean, c’mon—you’re on the second floor of a secure building. Who buzzed the cow in, Greg?
Music trivia note: “Who Buzzed the Cow In” was a rejected Baha Men song title.
Dude, you are so misguided. The space shuttle hasn’t even launched yet. It couldn’t possibly see your house right now, unless you lived, like, right next to Kennedy Space Center, and I highly doubt the crew would bother trying to see your house in that small amount of time they are in the atmosphere anyway. I don’t know whether I can really take you seriously anymore, saying such patently ridiculous things.
Cows are hard to bury, you have a good excuse. Plus, you could offer your guests some fresh steak. Everyone would want a dead cow in their living room after that.