I have to go to Curacao next month for a work thing. I know, tough life.
In surfing the official web page, I noticed that they make a point of advertising themselves to gay tourists--
--and I love how this section of the site is called “Alternative Curacao,” as though it’s a place where you can not only be openly gay but also wear black and listen to Interpol--
--and actually, another link that points to this section is called “Widespread Tolerance,” which is funny because it sounds like a weather report: “Today will be sunny and balmy in Curacao, with widespread tolerance, so haters might just want to stay indoors and knit"--
--anyway, I wondered why all those gay cowboys go to out-of-the-way mountains to conduct their secretive affairs when they could go to Curacao? If you’re going to deny your identity and fill yourself full of guilt and regret, you might as well do it where it’s really nice outside. Imagine the arthouse, Oscar-ready dialogue that might result:
“I ain’t queer, you know.”
“Me neither.”
“No, I mean I really ain’t queer. I just come here for the fruity tropical drinks.”
“Oh yeah? Then why don’t you bring your wife out here whenever you come see me?”
“.......”
“......”
“....I wish I could quit you. And then maybe go windsurfing.”
I haven’t actually seen Brokeback Mountain, but I love Annie Proulx’s short story. The final line is just beautiful: “There was some open space between what he knew and what he tried to believe, but nothing could be done about it, and if you can’t fix it you’ve got to stand it.” Which is a tragic, heart-rending line that underscores that point that I’m making here. If you have to stand anything, you might as well do so on the beach.
i wish i could quit YOU!!! you are hilarious!
cucacao? cool ! send me a postcard?
(it can have gay cowboys on it if you want, windsurfing or sipping caffé latté or whatever.)
that should of course have been cuRacao. bother.
There’s something so misguided about the statement, “I really ain’t queer. I just come here for the fruity tropical drinks.” You miht as well say, “I really ain’t queer. I just come here to participate in the Cher look-alike contest.”
The thought of cowboys on the beach, gay or otherwise, just doesn’t seem right to me. I mean, I don’t then they should prohibit them from coming or anything, I just think it’s a queer notion.
Hello, Greg.
sometimes i think your brain is just bigger than mine.
I get sent to Gilroy for work things. good times.
I hear they have some excellent garlic there, though.
I banged a hot cowboy in Gilroy once behind a make-your-own-decorative-garlic-vinegar tent. Talk about good times!
shut up, both of you.
Widespread Tolerance makes me think they permit Jam band music to be played, get out of the trip as fast as you can.
The movie is great too. And I give straight men major bonus points who see it, for being secure in their sexuality. Seriously, if you’re a straight guy, being willing to see this movie will make you that much more macho to women. (At least this one.
)
I only go to beaches that advertise for heterosexuals, you know, “_____ is a heterosexual-friendly destination.”
My transvestite friend only goes to transvestite friendly beaches: “_____ is a transvestite-friendly destination.”
My Jewish friends go Jewish friendly beaches: “_____ is a Jewish-friendly destination.”
Oh, wait. You were joking?
I of course linked “Widespread Tolerance” with the aforementioned gay-friendliness and came up with a much sicker picture.
But it might work as a porn title.