America Onlife.

Most people throw out those AOL CDs that say “40 Free Hours” on the cover.  Not me.  I mean, free hours are free hours, and life is precious.  So I hoard them.  I must have hundreds of them stacked up in my room.  By now, I estimate that I’ve given myself roughly 20 years of extra existence; I plan to use the time to learn how to make illuminated manuscripts.