1. Sting boasts to interviewers that he has frequent tantric sex with his wife that goes on for hours.  Is it really something to brag about that you can’t focus enough to get the job done?  Maybe Sting ought to be dreaming less about blue turtles or fields of fire and concentrating more on the job at hand. Where is Entertainment Weekly asking me for the secrets of my two-minute technique? 

2. I want to be clear: I saw An Inconvenient Truth and loved it. I’ve been genuinely impressed how it changed the fundamentals of national debate on global warming, so that the discussion became less about “It’s just one side of the argument” and more about “It’s real; now what do we do about it.” Still, though. The movie rails against the American tendency to consume too much--and wouldn’t that message have been more compelling if Gore, himself, showed a little restraint?

I’m not saying he has to go all Christina Ricci. But saving the world starts at home, tugboat.

3. Everyone wants to know the truth about Britney.  Why wasn’t my phone ringing off the hook when I began to go bald?  Frankly, discussing the matter in public would have been very healing for me.

Ingrates.