Nearly a year ago I complained about being moved from the fourth floor to the third floor of the place where I work.  Since then I’ve kept quiet about it.  But I haven’t been resting.  I’ve been politicking.  I’ve been conversationing.  I’ve been trying to return to my perch way up in the sky.

I talked to the Facilities Manager:

“I need to go back to my old location.”

“Well, space is tight and we have to put people where we have room.  What’s the big deal?”

“It’s noisy down here.  I can’t concentrate on reading other people’s blogs.”

“What?  What did you say?”

“Uh, I said the noise makes my head feel like it’s in a fog.”

“Oh.  I thought you said you couldn’t read other people’s blogs.”

“Ha!  Ha!  It is to laugh!  I would never say such a thing!”

“I don’t know whether you’d say such a thing or not.  What the hell is a blog?”

I also talked to the CFO:

“I need to go back to the fourth floor.  Part of my job here is creative.  I am an artist.  I need peace, quiet, and privacy to ply my trade.”

“Oh yeah, you’re a real artist.  Let me read a section from your latest press release: ‘The company today announced the appointment of Harlan Smithee to Vice President of Strategic Development.’ It’s practically Shakespearean.”

“No, I wrote that when I was still in my old space.  Here, take a look at one I wrote yesterday.”

“Let me see that:  ‘The company today announced the appointment of REDRUM REDRUM REDRUM REDRUM REDRUM’....okay, I can see your point.”

Today I return to my old, quiet location.  And I’m not going to treat this victory lightly.  I intend to use my newfound workplace stability to write the great American novel produce exciting marketing copy that will help my company reach its strategic objectives.