Wakes up next to Suzanne Pleashette
Eats in a diner with friends, 10-second blackout
Kills King Claudius before dying of a wound
Disappears under the ocean with the whale
Realizes he’s a ghost, and so is Nearly Headless Nick
Realizes Hermione is actually a woman
Caught texting to underaged staffers
Loses Florida in last-ditch recount
Realizes he’s a naked and emotional troubled stableboy in front of a live audience.
Gives the graduation address at Hogwarts with his fly unzipped.
Wow, Susanne Pleashette. It’s been a while since I’ve thought of her. A really long while.
Don’t forget The Rapture.
Don’t forget the classic “It was all a dream”.
Or perhaps more appropriately “It was all the delusional hallucinations of a severely disturbed young man locked away in a mental institution”. That would explain quite a lot.
ha ha Hamlet Potter!
I take it you’ve read ”How Harry Potter really ends” on Slate.com? (re: the Sopranos reference)
Haw haw haw...have you ever read McSweeney’s? mcsweeneys.net. Pretty friggin’ funny stuff, and you should consider submitting this to them.
Thanks THB, I’ll get right on that.
Didn’t read Slate but it’s a pretty obvious joke.
My guess: Harry is actually the evil apprentice to Palpatine, and Harry’s long-lost son rescues him form the Dark Side’s grip and allows him to die in peace.
I do have the right series, don’t I?
-- david
Before the “It was all a dream” scenario becomes apparent, there should at least be a scene where he’s standing at his locker in his underwear.