Sometimes I like to joke here at “Geese Aplenty.” Sometimes I kid.  Sometimes, on rare occasions, I even josh.

But there comes a time when joking is bad.  Wrong.  Inappropriate.  And the most important time? Ironic Video Joke #10 in the rental store.

You know what I’m talking about.  How many times have you heard a friend make an Ironic Video Joke before finally deciding on a real option?  How many times have you done it yourself?

“Let’s rent Corky Romano.”
“Oh I know, let’s pull an all-nighter and check out the first season of Dawson’s Creek.”
“I’d really like a Kevin Costner film festival.”

This is quality comedy.  Millions of people have shared a laugh at such harmless tomfoolery.  But as a point of social convention, it’s imperative to recognize that Ironic Video Joke #10 is where this good natured funning passes the boundary from whimsical to annoying.  Double digits is where you begin to risk life and limb.  If you cross this important boundary and chortle something like “Quick, let’s reserve our copy of David Spade’s magnum opus Joe Dirt,” don’t be surprised if the other person grabs you by the collar and shouts:

“Enough!  Can we get past the self-referential, winking irony that is the hallmark of modern society?  Is it wrong to admit that we want cinema to help us feel?  To connect with real emotions?  Are we so intent on distancing ourselves from our humanity with postmodern abandon that we can’t bring ourselves to say that we genuinely want to rent Akira Kurosawa?  Orson Welles?  John Hughes?  Please, please, I implore you--let the video title that next escapes your lips not be in an ironic throwaway, but rather a title that you actually might want to rent and view!”

“Resident Evil.”

“Damn you.  Were you not listening?”

“No, I’m serious.”

“Oh.”

Of course now you have a different problem altogether, laced with its own set of social minefields, which may require its own post at a later time.