If you live in California and work at a larger company, you may need to undergo harassment training in compliance with new law AB1825. In case you don’t have time to attend this training, I thought I’d offer some of the highlights.
According to the law, harassment takes two primary forms. The first is called hostile work environment. This occurs when many of the objects in the office that you depend on refuse to cooperate. For example, your Internet Explorer shuts down citing the need to “unexpectedly quit.” Or the fax machine may not work. Or your chair might squeak when you spin around on it. All of these situations contribute to a hostile work environment.
If you’re faced with a hostile work environment, it’s important to remember that many companies have a “no tolerance” harassment policy and therefore it’s up to you to immediately report the incidents in question. To do this, you should report the malfunctioning items directly to your Information Technology department. They will look up, laugh at you, and go back to playing Quake.
The other kind of harassment is called quid pro quo. This is where someone walks around the office speaking in Latin all the time, which doesn’t take long to become very annoying. I once knew someone who always said Quod Erat Demonstradum, and not even just when making a point. You’d say “Hey Biff, how you doing” and he’d say “Quod erat demonstradum” and then you’d have to throw a stapler at him.
There are also many subtler forms of harassment in the workplace. One that I have been personally subjected to is receiving off-color emails. It’s important to realize that just because you can change the font in an email doesn’t mean you should. Isn’t black text on white background good enough anymore? I’ve received emails from our manufacturing division that had alternating pink and green text--all set against “My Little Pony” wallpaper.
If you’re faced with quid pro quo or off-color email harassment, remember your company’s no tolerance policy. Report the incidents directly to human resources--who will look up, laugh at you, and go back to playing Quake.
Posted by Greg at 05:07 AM. Filed under:
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u r so funny.
I understand from reading news reports that women frequently file complaints about co-workers who make appropriate, courteous, comments like, “Great titties, babe!” or “Nice ass.” But men would never complain if a female co-worker said, “What a big dick you have.” (as opposed to “What a big dick you are,” which is an entirely different thing) Oh, I just realized I’ve been a working man for more than 40 years and I’ve never heard of a woman saying something like that, at least where it could be heard by others. Is there a message in there someplace?
Your posts make me laugh every day. And now I must go back to playing Quake.
“Papa Goose, what a big dick......” Oh, decisions, decisions......
for some unknown reason i have the image if papa smurf when i see papa goose’s name. needless to say, todays post sounds quite odd coming out of the mouth of papa smurf!
I experienced Quid Pro Quo harassment once. And then he ate my liver with fava beans and a nice KeeAAANtee…
Cloudy, I want to play, so I can get my mind off the kinds of comments my father’s been leaving lately.
“I see great things in store for you at this company....CLAARIISSEEEE.”
This is why I don’t work.
Wow. Funny. Really. And I’m an IT guy.
Hello, Greg.
Oh, see, yay! I work now (college goodbye) and had to complete a little online course called “Preventing Workplace Harrassment” yesterday so I definitely know what you’re talking about. Do they make everyone in California complete the same course? I would have enjoyed it more had we been able to play “throw the stapler at Latin speaking coworker” (though that would likely be me...hey...) rather than play that hokey version of Jeopardy! at the end.
Also, my chair has been trying to kill me since I got here. My computer laughs at me when I try to open a new program. Why are office objects so angry?
There must be a tactful way to tell people who use those colored, cartoony, emoticon-laden emails to knock it off. I haven’t thought of one yet. Are there going to be seminars about it, and if so, can we forward an email to everyone we know about it? One that threatens violence which will befall their livestock should they not comply?
I was at a conflict management seminar once and a guy in the back got up and asked how to handle a supervisor who was making his life miserable. Everyone pretty much laughed at him, including the seminar leader, who told him “It’s because she thinks you’re cute.” Like that makes it OK?
I felt bad for a few days afterwards for not speaking up and saying something like “Kick her in the nuts!”
You know.
Hmph. I get to go to Safe Handling of Radiation traning sessions instead of Workplace Harrassment. I’m not sure which one of us is in a better position…
since I’m in a CA gov’t office we got special training on harassment because so few of us were doing it properly. “Nice maracas” is not harassment of a samba percussionist. Offering “moustache rides” but requiring participants to don a five-point restraint system and a helmet puts a damper on the whole event. And if you go around saying “sic semper tyranis” no one will even know you’re harassing them unless you also just killed Abraham Lincoln. I had no idea it was so complicated. I also learned that the phrase “pants optional fridays” could be misconscrued. o what a giveaway.
LOL Funny post!! Thanks for the laugh on an otherwise stressful evening!! lol
Reminds me of when all of the secretaries at my firm send those emails, where the background is all pink and dotted with flowers..or else 2 totally clashing colors that make my eyes feel like lasers are burning them. I feel totally violated when that happens…
This is a gret take on all those silly classes. They should just call them How Not To Be An Asshole 101.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.