I considered giving up movies for an extended period--a fast, if you will--to see if I suffered any effects that suggested addiction. I could take up reading poetry again; I haven’t finished my Wallace Stevens anthology. Then my friend who works for Hewlett-Packard asked me if I wanted to see a private screening of Shrek 2 for HP employees. Now I know how Robert Downey Jr. feels. “Hey, Robert, this is your buddy Charlie Sheen! Congrats on getting through your narcotics rap with just probation and community service. I’m going to stop by your place and give you a gift of a MOUNTAIN OF CRACK.”
“Private screening” is a bit of a misnomer when it’s a multi-theater complex and every single theater is showing the same movie to a full house. But at least when you hear people laughing in the next room, you know it’s at something funny and not, say, Scooby Doo 2. And it was nice to see all the HP employees with their children in tow, all whispering prayers to Linux technology and Carla Fiorina.
It’s all for the best. My fast would have only lasted until Spider-Man 2 anyway, and although Wallace Stevens is nice for the first few pages, it doesn’t take long before you just want to punch him in the face.
Other accomplishments: assisting with the creation of three pizzas, pinpointing a decent $9.00 bottle of wine (Rosemount), and taking a tour of a friend’s new house. Notable failure: Attempting to start a conversation thread by asking, “Why is it that you can’t refer to ‘wheat’ in the singular? You always have to say, ‘Pass me the wheat.’ What if you only want one?” As I sit here and type this, I’m still staggered that nobody in the room decided to run with this.
Posted by Greg at 02:07 AM. Filed under:
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All I can suggest is to combine both parts of your post by watching Woody Allen’s “Love and Death”, paying special attention to the references to wheat.
My brother works for HP and he didn’t get any private screening. Is this a California thing? Again, I think I’m going to have to write Carla a stern letter.
I may have an answer for you. Or at least a door that leads to the answer.
Your movie addiction should take you to see “What The Bleep Do We Know”, where you will be immediately poured a glass of quantum physics talk that would go well with any $9.00 bottle of wine and three pizza gathering. You will be reminded that matter is in more then one place at the same time, and that we normally only see one thing at a time because that is how we are conditioned.
Maybe wheat somehow transcends our own limited thinking.
Or maybe just do what the other guy said, and watch a Woody Allen movie. It to will go well with wine and pizza.
http://www.whatthebleep.com/synopsis/
At least you didn’t say, “Pass me the sheep.”
Ismat, like Sarah B., I’m all in favor of the stern letters. J.J. Abrams and Carla had better mind their Ps and Qs.
Keith, that movie looks cool and it’s even coming to Berkeley.
Does everyone get jokes about Carla Fiorini? Is that really a General Audience joke? I guess we’re not in grad school anymore.....
carla? HOTTIE.
Thanks for the mercy comment, Sach!
Greg, the movie is sort of a whacky version of “Mindwalk”, if you’ve ever seen that one. It is pretty cool. Worth the price of admission just to hear and think about the line, “Have you ever wondered what thoughts are made of?”
nobody appreciates the rich comedic potential of essential grains. just try making a joke using spelt or quinoa. bunch of ungrateful ignoramouses, we are, i tell you. (or is that ignoramice?)
ps. wheat is included in the unit on “countable and uncountable nouns,” along with water, rice, oil, furniture, luggage, and skin.
We went to a movie yesterday. Hadn’t been to the theatres since LOTR: Return of the King. Anyway, it was Supersize Me and so worth the long lines, stiff parking fees and even stiffer ticket prices. Highly recommend it.
Uh, it’s Carly.. not that I really care.. really I don’t. swear.....
Dave, that you commented shows that you do, in fact, care. And that’s good. Thank you for caring.
I think the point here is that no one wants a single wheat. You can ask for some of the total amount of wheat, but anyone who asks for a single wheat is just a troublemaker. Oh yeah, Greg’s blog. Did you want that single wheat to go? Sprouted? Low-carb version?
perhaps the thread would have been more robust if you’d started asking about single malt rather than single wheat?
I’m just amazed that you’re in situations where you need the wheat, singular or plural, passed to you. You must go to better parties than I do.
I am embarrassed to say that my eyes totally lit up the moment I read the words Spiderman 2. What does that say about me?
But is it coming out soon??
Give up movies? Next thing you’ll be giving up TV! I’m your friend and I can’t let you do that. Think of all the little people who won’t find jobs in production if you stop watching. Because you will start a trend and that just can’t happen.
I agree. Give up wheat instead. All of them.
The $9 bottle of wine that Greg is referring to is specifically a Rosemount Shiraz. It makes for a great Sangria too.
“Shiraz” It’s like those Australians have a different word for everything!
Sorry if you don’t get grape jokes.