MOM: And how are your other friends?
ME: Oh, my old friend Scott added me on Facebook. I haven’t heard from him in years.
DAD: Who?
ME: My college roommate. You know him as Scott-Ernie-Scott.
DAD: Oh right. Why did we call him that, again?
ME: Because his real name is Ernie. We were in an English class and the teacher said ‘I’m going to read your names off the roll sheet, but let me know what you’d like to be called.’ And Ernie turned to me and said ‘I never liked my name.’ And I said ‘Maybe you should ask to be called Scott.’ And the teacher read Ernie’s name, and Ernie said ‘Here, but I’d like to be called Scott.’ And the teacher gave him a funny look, but referred to him as Scott for the rest of the year. And the name stuck, and we always called him Scott. And apparently he still goes by the name twenty years later because his name is Scott on Facebook.
DAD: Hmm.
ME: What?
DAD: Doesn’t he realize the importance of being Ernest?
Yes, it is important to always be Frank and Earnest with your name. Even if your name is Scott. Or not.
wow, for once i am not leaving a comment hoping to one-up the post. well played, sir!
ouch.
also, fantastic.
It’s moments like these that things like the ‘instant rimshot’ need to be available in the real world…
And now I’ve been made immortal, preserved in the archive of Geese Aplenty as a wilde and crazy guy,
Fine. I laughed. You got me. FINE.
(Damn it. I’m still laughing. No one should laugh before 10 a.m. It’s not healthy.)
Greg, I had no idea that was how Scott came into being. That is too funny. You’ve got me laughing/crying at work.
Oh yeah, I’ve always taken credit for it. And now I can take credit for setting a world-class punchline.
I was recently in an Anatomy class and my neighbor was called “Greg” by the teacher on the first day. We spent the rest of the semester changing his name for her, never really letting her get comfortable with his real name.
Oh, and “Greg” became a token miscreant who failed at everything, sort of an imaginary student. It was hilarious until we discovered that the real Greg sat right in front of us.
Stumbled on your blog, and will be reading more. Funny!
I sat next to you during HS graduation when you wrote out your name card as Greg H. the Third (or was it Greg H. Esquire?) just to see if they would say it that way and they did. Oscar would be proud.
Haw!!!
a wilde and crazy guy
*snort
Yeah but being earnest doesn’t mean you get away scott free.
*Funny*!
I’ve always loved that story but I never knew it happened in English class. How come you never changed my name? xoxo your turtle dove
Hysterical!
And I’m having a hard time remembering people who “invite me to be a friend” from years ago, much less their actual name!