Framed.

I’m pleased to announce that I’ve joined the ranks of professional photographers.  I’ve given the widely known and well-regarded travel site Shmapp!! permission to use a photo of Eyre Square in Galway, Ireland that I took last year.

The photo can be seen here.  Note the photo credit that reads “Photo: Greg Howard.” It’s important to note that this is not the jerk who plays with the Dave Matthews Band or the nimrod who did the Sally Forth comic strip. This is me.

I know what you’re thinking.  You’re thinking “Gosh, Greg, I love Schmapp!!  I never use Lonely Planet or Rick Steves. When I plan a trip, I go straight to Schmapp!!  It is the travel site of choice for both young and old! It’s a household name!  Clearly, you have made it as a serious artist in the realm of photography and other photo-related subjects.  And yet, I can’t help but wonder--is it possible that I can match your feat?  Is there a way that me, a lowly amateur photographer, could ever aspire to reach the heights of your artistic triumph?”

And my response is, be of good cheer. It is possible that you, too, could have some random photo of yours selected to be on Schmapp!! just like I have. But in order to do so, you must follow several important rules:

  • Always travel using the completely obsolete half-megapixel Canon Powershot that you bought for your New Zealand trip years ago.  This will ensure a grainy, poor resolution photo that gives you that documentary, “lived in” look that quality travel sites like Schmapp!! just love.

  • Don’t stop to frame or consider your photo. Snap randomly. That will be the best way to channel your inner muse.

  • Don’t wreck the spontaneity of the moment by changing the setting. Whether it’s a landscape, portrait, or night shot, always shoot on “Auto.”

  • Similarly, never mind all those menus. Did Ansel Adams use menus?  If you want a menu, go to a restaurant. Stop screwing around and shoot.

  • Ply yourself with plenty of the local Guinness before embarking on your artistic journey.

    Naturally, I received no payment for the photo.  I am an artist, and a true artist does not need to “prove” his skill by being paid. The editors at Schmapp!! understand this just as I do. Nevertheless, I’d like to mention that I am now available for professional photo shoots for every occasion.  Specialties include weddings, parties, and tasteful nudes. 

    Posted by Greg at 06:08 AM. Filed under:

    (13) Comments • Permalink

    Next entry: iOk, uOk. Previous entry: Bed bug.

    Your mother will be shocked when she learns you do not check the white balance for every shot.

    Posted by  on  09/24  at  06:30 AM

    Join the club, Greg! I got my photo in Schmap too:
    http://www.schmap.com/melbourne/entertainment_concerts/#p=115356&i=115356_5.jpg

    All in all, it’s not a bad deal. Their terms are respectful of your rights and their site is nice enough that you don’t feel dirty for being associated with it. Maybe this will compel people to travel to Ireland and take a far better photo.

    Posted by Jack  on  09/24  at  10:20 AM

    Oh yes. I’m shocked.

    Posted by  on  09/24  at  05:03 PM

    That’s awesome!!

    Watch out, Annie Leibovitz!!

    Posted by teahouseblossom  on  09/24  at  05:52 PM

    I am tasteful. I can be nude. Shoot me Greg, shoot me!

    (sorry, couldn’t resist...OK, maybe not so tasteful after all...)

    Posted by  on  09/25  at  03:18 PM

    Schmapp!! Hahaha. Why does that word make me so schmappy?!  Holy shit I’ve found the cure for depression.

    Posted by Kristine  on  09/26  at  10:51 AM

    White balance? Is this some sort of Jena 6 reference?

    Posted by Greg  on  09/27  at  10:24 PM

    White balance could mean black kids shouldn’t be convicted of attempted murder with an all-white jury, but in this case it refers to an electronic color adjustment system. Look in your owner’s manual.

    Posted by  on  09/28  at  08:52 AM

    Hmm… tasteful nudes. I may take you up on that.

    Posted by hue  on  10/05  at  03:17 PM

    They used one of my photos for San Diego-- it was a completely random photo I took of fancy Malibu bottles at the bar of Rock Bottom. smile Schmap is ALL about the top-notch photographic representation of travel-worthy cities.

    Posted by lo  on  10/14  at  07:19 PM

    Hi Greg,
    Is it totally weird that I want to ask you to be Flickr friends even though I only know you through blog-readership?

    Posted by Dataceptionist  on  01/23  at  10:25 PM

    Is it totally weird that I want to ask you to be Flickr friends even though I only know you through blog-readership?

    Posted by Dataceptionist  on  01/23  at  10:26 PM

    damn double post :(

    Posted by Dataceptionist  on  01/23  at  10:28 PM

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