What’s up with President’s Day, anyway?  I think I speak for all Americans when I say that every day is President’s Day.

Regardless of how badly he’s screwing up foreign and domestic policy, he can pick up the phone at any time and say “I’ve got a hankering for baby back ribs and dirty greens.  Send those up immediately.  Oh, and also?  We think those hot actresses on ‘Gilmore Girls’ are linked to Al Qaeda.  Send up their dossiers, and make sure they include phone numbers and turn-ons.”