I was watching the new Flash Gordon series on Sci-Fi the other night, and I’m pretty sure it was awful, but I’m not positive because a particularly atrocious piece of dialogue near the beginning caused me to be lost in thought for the rest of the 90 minutes.
In this show’s version of the character, Flash is a marathon runner who lives with his mom. His ex, Dale Arden, is a television reporter. He runs into her and says “Dale, you look fantastic.” She shrugs off his compliment, replying “It’s just hair and makeup.”
And I’m like--what? What did she say? What does that mean?
Is she saying that hair and makeup aren’t important, and that she’s actually not looking all that good?
Or is she saying that since we all know that hair and makeup (well, hair anyway) are crucially important in a person’s appearance, she’s saying that she knows she looks good and that Flash ought to shut the hell up?
There’s actually two ways to look at the situation. One, the show was written by lobotomized monkeys who couldn’t write a coherent conversation between two fictional characters if their lives depended on it.
Second, the line actually represents a kind of zen koan. It’s a cosmic riddle, one you ponder endlessly until the mental energy accumulates inside your mind and eventually helps you reach a state of transcendent insight so you can unlock the secrets of the universe.
After due consideration, I’ve decided that option #2 is the correct one.
So if you see me, go ahead and tell me how we’re existential specks of dust, twirling on the head of a pin as we’re blown through the cosmic maelstrom on our way to a rendevous with eternity. I’ll simply shrug and say “It’s just hair and makeup.”
I can relate and when asked to describe myself, usually stick with ‘big pile of skin and hair.’
maybe you have to be a woman to understand it but I totally get what she means and don’t think there’s anything strange about the statement. I’ve been known on occasion to say, “it’s just makeup.” of course, on a daily basis I only wear lipstick so when I do the full makeup bit, people tend to notice. anyway. I’m sticking with my fond memories of the old flash gordon and not giving the new version a chance because I’m old and that’s my prerogative.
FLASH! aaa-aaah.
Pea, I’m assuming your “old” Flash is the one that Cloudy references, which is kind of amusing considering the REAL Flash was a black and white movie serial and, before that, a newspaper strip from the 1930s. But for our generation, it’s all Max Von Sydow and Queen.
Doesn’t Dale say this line in the 1980’s movie? Flash is slated for execution and Dale’s been made Ming’s concubine. She’s got some Mongorrific outfit on when she visits him in the prison, and Flash compliments her. “It’s the makeup” she says tearily.
I’m thinking homage. My theory’s not as funny as Greg’s existential pontification, though.
Oh you laugh but I totally get it. And this:
http://knightwriter.blogdrive.com/archive/103.html
proves it.
Buster Crabbe was the only Flash Gordon who mattered.
You took me on a trip in the wayback machine with this one. In sixth grade, I used to retreat to the audio/visual lab with about 7 other damaged little nerds and we watched Flash (the ‘recent’ Queen-ish one) every day. Not kidding...every day. Wait, I think somebody got their hands on a copy of Condorman at some point. We quickly dismissed it and returned to Flash.
I’m going to go with the lobotomized monkeys. They actually canceled the Dresden files for this drivel. Yep. Me, geek. I’m okay with it.
I think she means “everyone looks good when they’ve had their hair and makeup done professionally”
or, it’s all an elaborate charade of hair and makeup? I’m usually quite ordinary?