I received an email this weekend. Here’s what the email said:

Subject: YOUR SPRINT BILL IS READY

Hello GREG HOWARD:

THIS MESSAGE IS TO INFORM YOU THAT YOUR SPRINT BILL IS NOW AVAILABLE FOR YOUR REVIEW. TO VIEW AND PAY YOUR BILL, PLEASE LOG ON WITH THE ENCLOSED LINK. THANK YOU FOR USING SPRINT CUSTOMER CENTER.

Here is my response:

Hello SPRINT:

I KNOW I’M ONLY A MARKETING GUY AT A SMALL FIRM AND I DON’T WORK FOR A BIG SHOT PHONE COMPANY, BUT EVEN I KNOW THAT IT’S RUDE TO WRITE CUSTOMER-DIRECTED EMAILS IN ALL CAPS. IT’S CALLED SHOUTING. IS AOL YOUR PARENT COMPANY OR SOMETHING? ON AN UNRELATED NOTE, IT’S DUMB THAT YOU’RE NAMED AFTER A FAST RUN. PACIFIC BELL HAS A NORMAL NAME AND SO DOES MCI. IF YOUR COMPETITION WAS NAMED “JOG” OR “SKIP” IT WOULD MAKE MORE SENSE. GET WITH THE PROGRAM. IN CLOSING, I HATE YOU.

SINCERELY, GREG.