Cell-ebrations.

You know who’s got guts? The marketing people at K-Mart.

I’m sitting there watching Lost, and it suddenly switches to a commercial showing kids in pajamas hanging Christmas wreaths.  Letters appear on the screen: “Martha Stewart Everyday Living.”

Those guys actually expect us to believe that Martha’s current “everyday living” is comprised of scenes of domestic bliss, rather than Martha being pinned against a wall by a woman named Hildy who hisses, “I’m your den mother and you’re my girl scout.”

HA! We noticed that too!  But, was I the only one who noticed Tom Cruise’s cousin on LOST?  I KNEW he would play a pivotal role!

Posted by CF  on  12/02  at  07:41 AM

Actually, Hildy “wouldn’t touch that frigid bitch with a ten-foot pole”.

Posted by EV  on  12/02  at  07:46 AM

“Caged Heat”
Showtime Afer Hours- The Passions of Hildy and Ms. Stewart.  damn, that’s HOTTT!

Posted by ed  on  12/02  at  08:05 AM

I think you have the roles reversed. Martha is nobody’s bitch.

Posted by Gopi  on  12/02  at  08:12 AM

that campaign won out over “hurry in before we’re consumed by Roebuckasaurus, dying king of a doomed commercial breed!” The thing was, they had a really cute Roebuckasaurus so it worked better than it sounds. 

Posted by dan  on  12/02  at  08:16 AM

poor martha.

Posted by romy  on  12/02  at  08:39 AM

It does me good to imagine Ms. Stewart whimpering for her manicurist.  I bet her nails are skaggy right now.  Ditto her dye job.

Posted by Auntie Sarah  on  12/02  at  08:40 AM

CF - THAT is his cousin. That guy gives me the creeps.  I did mention it to my husband that I had never see that guy in the show before.

He’s always playing villians.

Posted by Mona  on  12/02  at  09:50 AM

My MIL just bought me a Martha Stewart pillow today.  I was thinking something similar when I got it.

Posted by Noner  on  12/02  at  10:03 AM

How wickedly funny!

Posted by Faith  on  12/02  at  11:29 AM

I can’t wait to see how she integrates the experience. Will Martha show us how to melt plastic spoons into a deadly weapon or make a cigarette lighter from a potato?

Posted by Dirty Dan Sin  on  12/02  at  12:31 PM

Hair pie for Martha this holiday season

Posted by Catholic School Boy  on  12/02  at  12:58 PM

I’m with Gopi. Plus, she’s somewhere called Camp Cupcake. How tough could these women be?

I’m guessing a favorite past time of good ol’ Martha right now is guessing how much money she’s gonna make because of the recent Sears/K-mart merger.  :D

Posted by patricia  on  12/02  at  01:05 PM

that’s kinda hot.

Posted by y  on  12/02  at  01:56 PM

You can actually make it through an episode of Lost?

Posted by anna  on  12/02  at  06:15 PM

I think it’s great.  It has its good and bad episodes, but it’s a rare thing--a character-driven fantasy.

Posted by Greg  on  12/02  at  06:27 PM

Go Martha!  I hope she makes gobs of $$$ from the book she will write while in the pin.  Can’t wait to buy it.  I liked her before ... there was nothing like Martha’s “It’s a good thing.” (so what if she’s a B ... gotta be to get anywhere in this world!) And she’s still goin strong (despite Camp Cupcake) ... go Martha!

Posted by J  on  12/02  at  06:34 PM

Martha’s busy making her cell toilet into a cornucopia.

Posted by Mamacita  on  12/02  at  07:17 PM

Maybe I keep catching it on the off nights.

Posted by anna  on  12/02  at  07:39 PM

Suddenly I feel a bit sorry for Martha.

Posted by Flip  on  12/02  at  08:33 PM

i also find it kinda’ hot.  im worried now.

Posted by jenB  on  12/02  at  10:40 PM

I didn’t see that punchline coming (why? why!) and am now wiping coffee from my monitor, thank you. 

Is it bad that I really miss her cooking show on the Food Network now that they’ve pulled it?  (Don’t answer.)

Posted by deb  on  12/03  at  04:36 AM

I like “Lost” too, it’s refreshing to watch one of those shows where someone isn’t going to get voted off the island or show their boobies for a jar of peanut butter.

And I agree with Gopi as well, Martha seems far more likely to be the pinner and not the pinnee. She looks wicked scary when she’s pissed. :/

Posted by Kimberley  on  12/03  at  07:14 AM

Yeah. Last I heard Martha was busy squirrelling away contraband spices (powdered sugar, butter and cinnamon) in her cell which she stole from the kitchen and hid in her bra! God only knows what she and Hildy are up to…

Posted by snowy  on  12/03  at  09:56 AM

Okay, I’m going to be a pain here, but I have an inkling you might care and I’d want you to do the same for me, if I’d written the post before this one, which I didn’t: You’ve misused comprise.

..."everyday living” comprises scenes of domestic bliss…

Posted by portia  on  12/04  at  06:28 AM