Bed bug.

Sometimes I’m told that I don’t like to try new things in bed. But that’s just not true.  Sometimes I sleep on my side. Sometimes I sleep on my stomach. Sometimes I stack up the pillows behind my neck. Sometimes I elevate my legs using a highly sophisticated array of matching blankets and throw cushions.

Clearly, comments like this simply suggest people projecting their own feelings about themselves.  And it forces me to say, hey, no need to blame me for your own lack of adventure. Come join me way out here on the precipice, where I like to say that if you’re not on the edge, you’re taking up too much room.

at the risk of pulling back the curtain, on entries like this, do you come up with the punchline and work backwards? just curious.

Posted by Patricia  on  09/19  at  11:21 PM

Do your partners mean your unwillingness to eat anchovies and crackers in bed??

Posted by  on  09/20  at  05:54 AM

Did someone try to change your Sleep Number on you? Tcha…

Posted by  on  09/20  at  07:16 AM

I was taking one of those stupid online quizzes and it was the only answer to the question that I wanted to give but they didn’t have it listed as one of the options so I blogged it. But what is a sleep number?

Posted by Greg  on  09/20  at  08:02 AM

Sleep number: person’s individual setting on a particular brand of aero bed that allows the users to have separate degrees of inflation, and therefore of firmness, on two sides of a queen or king bed. You obviously don’t watch enough late night TV so have missed their informercials.

Posted by  on  09/20  at  10:21 AM

Oh. Yeah, I’m too busy calling to order the E-Z Bake Waffle Maker.

Posted by Greg  on  09/20  at  10:38 AM

Have you tried sleeping hanging from your feet, you know with boots nailed to the ceiling?

Posted by MollyB  on  09/20  at  05:43 PM

Goodness. Now we’re talking about creativity in bed? I believe you’ve lowered the tone of this most excellent and highbrow blog down by several notches.

Posted by bohémienne  on  09/21  at  06:19 AM

Is anyone else impressed by the fact that Greg’s father uses the plural forum when describing Greg’s bedmate(s)?

Posted by  on  09/21  at  03:18 PM

I just found your site tonight & I’ve gotta say it had me rolled over in pain. Very classic humor. Loved it!! I’ll be back to read more.

Posted by FENICLE  on  09/21  at  04:16 PM

Hey, do you make bed forts like I do?  If not, you’re clearly not adventurous enough in bed.

Posted by teahouseblossom  on  09/22  at  08:36 PM

They make EZ-Bake Waffle Makers?

Posted by EV  on  09/25  at  02:11 PM

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